About Me

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A 26 year old average Indian girl: the girl next door types. I have nothing extraordinary to differentiate me in the crowd but my job profile does grab some attention. Been an average student till my 12th and wished to be a Vet Doctor because I love the four legged more than the two legged, but the rat race took my toll. Did BSc in Biotechnology and managed to wear those Doctor’s coat, but tasted failure for the first time when flunked in Chemistry. Failure made me realize the mystery of my destiny and sowed a dream of journalism. A pointless journey saw its first point in journey and the dream sprouted as a crime reporter. After topping College kept jumping companies till I became a crime reporter (the blossomed dream). Destiny was kind and in Indian Express Bangalore, my dream bloomed and became a crime reporter within eight months of work. Three years later my name is counted among the few good crime reporters of Bangalore, which was a dream sown five years back. But ugly side of success has placed me where failure had placed me once. In a dream job but in search of a new dream, I write to be heard and to be told. I sow a dream eagerly wait to know what I would reap.

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

In search of an answer… answer from my inner self

Is it ok to live a life of someone you just do not associate with? I don’t know. I do not have answers to a number of questions running in my head right now. For questions I thought my inner self was answerable, like
  • Who am I? 
  • What are my roles?
  • What are my responsibilities?
  • What is respect for me?
  • What is my level of patience?
  • What are my needs and necessities?
  • What makes me happy?
  • What makes me sad?
  • And it ends with what it started with...Who am I?

Whenever I had a question, I always had an answer screaming from within. Loud and clear! Today, with so many questions in my head, I hear no answer. Not even a fading sound, not even a squeal.
  • Isn’t killing your own rights a violation? 
  • Isn’t killing your dreams a murder?
  • Isn’t killing your ego a destruction?
  • Isn’t killing your self esteem a suicide?

I do not know. I do not know. I do not know… In search of an answer… is somebody listening?


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Thursday, July 17, 2014

Life and after #life…

People know I have been a crime reporter. I think I have seen more dead bodies than anybody else in my family. It’s a fact, although there is nothing to be proud of. When I try to recall those days, there are a few gory pictures which cloud my head. The reason these pictures have remained in the back of my mind is because the death was brutal. I never cried for any deaths, as it was my job and no emotions involved.

Yesterday, I got to know a very close relative passed away. The picture of him lying helplessly like a bunch of bones is haunting me since then. He was a body builder who represented India internationally a number of times. The only picture about him I had till yesterday was looking at him in crisp ironed shirt which would remain so for the entire day. 

But when I saw him for the last time yesterday, I couldn’t find a single thing which could fit in the same frame of picture painted earlier.  He took care of his body like an asset which would never perish… but it did! A muscular body shrunk into a mass of bones and skin which was being addressed as just ‘body’.

Life… I still don’t know what’s the whole purpose of life
Why are kids born?
Why do we study?
Why do we work?
Why do we earn money?
What do we marry?
Why do we have kids?
Why do we grow old?

When we all have to #RIP one day! 
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